26th week.

On Tuesday will mark the beginning of my third trimester, that is SCARY. My baby shower here is soonish, the 10th of June.. but the one in California isn't until the end of June, which thoroughly scares the shit out of me.. I want to go and buy the things we need, and I want to be prepared. I am so terrified that he's going to come really early.. I just have this feeling that he will. We're still waiting on medicaid also, which is something else that's scary.. they can take up to 45 days from the time we filed, which was the first week we were here I think May 2nd? So, we still have a little while. According to my baby app, I should be going to the doctor every two weeks.. but I can't if I don't have insurance. Medicaid should have some sort of process that if someone is pregnant they get precedence over other people. I have like 3 months left, if that.. I need some sort of medical attention to know he's okay! :/

Anyway - part of me wants to go and buy one of the little baby cradle things that hang out by your bed for when the baby is first born..they have them at walmart for around $60.. just in case, ya know? I could just keep it in the box, and if we receive something like that, then we could return it. We have the crib, but no mattress.. and I want to go buy the mattress..but it's another thing that's on my registry. :,( Would have rather had the baby showers both in the beginning of June, but other things were more important. Not to mention, when we go down there.. we are doing our last 4d appointment... I cannot WAIT to do that. I'm ready to make a trip there just to do that and come back home ;) I want to see him again! I want to know he's okay! Well, I know he's okay because he's beating the crap out of my stomach hourly..but still, I want to see his face. I still haven't absorbed the fact that I'm going to be a mother. Such a scary feeling.. happy, but scary. My life is no longer about myself.. I have to make sure this little guy is taken care of, fed, happy. It would be easier for me if I had a job.. or at least if Travis had one. I know we have unemployment and it takes care of us well.. but what would happen if they decided to just take that from us? We would be SO screwed! Jobs are much more secure.

Onto other things.. Travis' friends were in town for the weekend for his best friends sisters birthday.. only a few of them are still here.. haven't seen one of them. I guess that's the downside of living in vegas.. can't take time out of partying to come see friends :( I don't want to be pregnant anymore! LOL.. I want him here.. period.

I think this was more or less just ranting. Aside from all of that, things have been wonderful.. I still love our little apartment and Travis is still happy and we're doing great :)